Give the SB an Earful via Mild Bossiness and a Begrudging Complement

Q: Hey, hey person who’s name I know not!

Yea I read that Olympic sex article last week and found it lame. Yes eveyone at the Olympic village is hot. Doh they have hot sex. And . . .? The article dramatically  stated the obvious in breathless highschooler prose. Not up to spectacular bitch standards. Generally, your stuff’s not bad. That article, though is tabloid pap. Sorry. Stuff like this and this is so much cooler.

BTW why don’t you have commenting activated/ Are you on twitter? I’ve wanted to have internet conversations with you before (send you pics/links etc) but have been put off by the lack of commenting (disqus much?)  and the need to email everything.

Join the internet please. It’s fun.

–TJ

A: TJ, TJ, TJ . . . When I first read your email, I was surer than a shine on a black patent leather shoe that you were some geeky boy with a secret crush on SB. When I checked out your blog, however, I discovered that you are a female sewing Australian molecular biologist who specializes in fungi! What the hell? And correct me if I’m wrong, but I deduce, by reading between the lines of your surliness, that you just want to be friends! Yes? Yes!

I loved your email and though it left my hair a bit windblown, I will attempt to address all of your concerns:

1. I agree that the Olympic sex article was written in breathless highschooler prose, but much of my life, both written and otherwise, is carried out in breathless highschooler prose.

2. I disagree that the article was tabloid pap, and I actually spent a highly entertaining evening with friends speculating about the wonderful generation of athletes that would be spawned if the IOC was devious/smart enough to give the athletes faulty condoms. We then proceeded to create our own superbabies by pairing the athletes off, like Noah’s ark, and not surprisingly, Serena Williams was a popular pick.

3. So, you think my “stuff’s not bad.” You are too kind.

4. As for comments, I can only say this: like panties, sometimes the unsightly lines are just not worth it. And also, my tech support guy is always golfing.

5. I am on twitter and you can find me @specbitch.

6. It’s too bad you find email so toilsome because you are good at it. Being the queen of this blog and an SB, I opt not to make myself too available and that’s advice everyone should take.

7. I have joined the internet in so far as I am comfortable, which, in terms of entering a pool is just about up to my bum. I will wade around here for a while if it’s ok with you.

Thank you for the fiesty words, fiesty one. I look forward to connecting with you via Twitter.

xoxo,

SB